So, I had a really bad week in terms of fitness. I had a stressful project due at work, so naturally I began “comfort” eating (and drinking too, if I want to be honest) myself into oblivion.Basically I abused my body for 7 days straight – and justified it by telling myself I deserved this “reward” for all my hard work.

Please tell me you have weeks like this – where you go into kind of a food coma to “salve” your stress.

I’m not an alcoholic but I think it’s a lot like “falling off the wagon.” You just can’t help yourself. I virtually didn’t sleep for five days. so I gave myself rewards each night – a Bloody Mary, two hot dogs on the grill, a bowl of chips before bed…you know the drill. Hard day = excessive nights.

I can’t explain what happens to me during these episodes. It’s like an alien has taken over my body and I can actually hear myself calling, “Hey, Alien. What did you do with Jan? Let her out!!

I’m back on track this week, but I was petrified to go to my workout this morning. My butt felt like a sack of potatoes dragging five yards behind me. My body felt like mush and I thought I’d surely collapse during my squats. To top it off, I would probably get Brad as my trainer. Ugh.

I walked in head down, the weight of guilt. “Hello Brad.” (crap!). He wanted to start with squats. Of course. To my surprise, they were easy.  So were my crunches. And push ups.  What the heck? Had I begun to strengthen my body to a point where I could actually handle an occasional binge?

Surprisingly, this discovery doesn’t make me want to binge more. Quite the opposite. I want to continue strengthening. To see how strong I can get. I’ve already made my next appointment! Let’s get it on, Brad!